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18:35 

Hello everyone!

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
Today I decided to write in a new diary and to write in English.
I found out that it's easier for me to say about some things in English, that's why.
I have many thoughts and many stories I can't tell in my other diary.
No one of my friends should know.
So I hope to stay incognito.

@темы: Good day to start whatever you want!

19:38 

One

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
I have two lovers.
Both are married.
It's just sex.
Still, I can't get rid of one of them or even both. Two much is between us. And men are easily offended.
I do like them, besides the sex, we are friends.
They, of course, don't know about each other.

And I found out that I don't need sex very much. Maybe there just wasn't so many partners in my life.
Those two above are as good as they can be, but not accepting everything I want and in reverse.
I can say, if combined, they'll be good.

If you're going to say to me that I'm bad or worse - save your breath. I know everything about myself. No one should judge.
No one is sinless.

That's why I'll close comments for this one.

@темы: my thoughts, my life

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00:34 

Two

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
Sometimes I think if I had more brains I would totally have had another life.

No, I'm not complaining.
Money problems, as they are, are going to be solved.
And for other things in my life I should only be thankful.

I mean about the past.
Somehow I thought that this life is just a preview and I'll be given another one to live. But not very long ago I found out that this life is going to pass and I'm just doing nothing worth doing - I just swim with the stream.

I would have gone with this man, if I had more brains. Maybe I was going to be ruined afterwards, but I will never know now.
I would have changed my University, if I had more brains.
It's still possible to learn the real thing, the thing that I would like, and try myself in every possible likeble jobs to find the meaning of life.

Sometimes I feel myself worn out, though I'm not that old.
But I can't create anymore.
Where did my inspiration go?

And still I believe that it'll all pass and it'll be fine and good.

@темы: my life, my thoughts

17:14 

Three

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
I can say I was in an abusive relationship.
He was very good to me at the start, but as the years passed, he started nagging me about everything: my family, my friends, my hobbies and myself.

When I ended this all, thanks to my friends and family, I couldn't believe how blind I was.
Why I allowed him to step on my pride, my beliefs, my family, my opinion and my freedom?
For fear of change? For stupid money?
For love that, from his side, never existed?
I have no answers to that.

And yes, I hate to argue.
But I learned now how to do it. It's essential for me and every other person with such character as mine.

@темы: my life, my thoughts

14:43 

Four

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
I have a gentle disposition.
And that's why I was working very hard on one of my jobs.
I had four bosses right above me and many others above them.
And they had the courage to say to me that I did so little!
And how could I not be able to do all the work they give me!

When I did quit this job they took on my place three girls.

@темы: episodes, my life

19:31 

Five

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
I have a friend who's married to an American.
And he's like knows some of my story.
Two times he tried to learn Russian through me without payment.
Every time I bring the payment around - there is the silence.
He's just a greedy one.

@темы: my life, my thoughts

09:48 

Six

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
First watermelon of the season.
My grandma wanted to buy a melon, but I hate them, they make me feel sick.

I've read this "Harry Potter and the Cursed Child".
Just a fanfic, nothing more.
I've seen much better.

Currently reading James Asher's Chronicles.

@темы: books, fandom, my life

16:57 

Seven

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
I think there is something out there. God or Fatum or whatever you'll like to call it.
I had a very huge problem with money. My problem is - there is no money.
And I found a job if not to fix it, but to help a bit and not to starve.
Yes, it was that bad.
But now it's better.
Thanks, God.

@темы: my thoughts, my life

15:55 

Eight

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
Sometimes my mother makes me feel bad.
Like when she says:
- We'll buy you new beautiful clothes when you lose weight.
And I need to walk around in old worn clothes. Thanks, mum...
Like only thin people need to wear beautiful and new clothes.
And no, I'm not fat. To be "standard pretty" I need to lose ten kilos.

- Your multicook is shit because I did put in it potatoes and after five more minutes - half a kilo of buckweat. And the potatoes didn't boil!
We have a bet: she will put a usual pot on a electric stove and try cook same way she did. She says potatoes will boil.
If I lose, I'll buy her a big icecream.
Same goes another way round.

- You were in Metro mall with us, I remember it clearly!
But I swear I wasn't. I've never been in Metro mall in my life.
I don't have a card, my father did and he could take only his wife, my mother.
She says I'm the one dellusional.
:facepalm3:

@темы: my thoughts, my life

08:23 

Nine

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
I hate to wash my ears. I still wash them, of course, but without any happiness about it.
It's kind of irrational, but I can do nothing about it.
I had an otitis after I came back from the seashore. Because I was diving and a peace of wood somehow found a way into my ear.
And I hate diving too.

@темы: my life

01:55 

Ten

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
I'm the one dellusional, as it seems.
I don't remember great pieces of my life.
Could there be done anything about it, I wonder?

@темы: my life, my thoughts

21:29 

Eleven

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
I had a dream this night.
Some man, I couldn't see his face, presented me a watch.
It means that I will be married soon. O_o
Pretty interesting, because I don't even have a boyfriend or something.
And better still - I'm not going to get married, thanks, I was there before. Nothing interesting.

@темы: my life, my thoughts

21:32 

Twelve

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
I will be teaching.
Russian to foreigner.
This should be interesting.

@темы: my thoughts, my life

00:05 

Thirteen

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
I caught a cold and hate everything about it.
All summer I was ok and now... Please, speed up the time a bit. It's not easy when I'm sound and it's awful when I'm ill.
I need to sleep but I can't - my nose isn't breathing.


The job found me. I don't like the boss.
I think he's not going to help me or do my life easier. And I really-really need this understanding.

@темы: my life, my thoughts

02:51 

Fourteen

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
Making plans. I wish!
I still wish for a letter from Hogwarts.

I need:
- to find and get a job;
- to give money back to my friends;
- to find strength and start physical exercises;
- to take pencil and start practicing drawing;
- to read more books;
- to find a good man (or woman) to love and live with.

@темы: my thoughts, my life

22:14 

Fifteen

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
Here I am!
Still alive, feeling good and thankful for it.

I lost myself in Sevvitus fics on fanfiction.net.
And at the same time I read one of Agatha Cristie's books about Hercule Poirot.
It's a lot easier then to get a hold of myself.
At least - reading books - check.


Nothing happens to me, but people remember me. How very sweet of them!

@темы: my life, my thoughts

00:59 

Sixteen

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
Still without a job, who cares.
I don't have any strength to do my hobbies for so long, what can I say about a job.
I found some applications but don't have time to send my CV.
And really I couldn't care less. I just want to sleep most of the time.

----------------------------------

I'm playing in all sorts (lol, not all, but still) of promo-actions before the New Year.
I want to win.
Wish me luck.
I need it.

@темы: my thoughts, my life

01:13 

Seventeen

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
Yeah, I already see "one hundred seventy five" and so on.
Happy New Year and all that)

I'm lying on my bed listening to music.
I should sleep, but I don't.
At least here I can say that it's freezing outside and our water supply froze as well. But not all, thank Merlin)
We still have a working sink with hot and sometimes cold water.
I found time and some power in me to study yesterday.
Yay, Photoshop, you're going to be mine to rule!

I feel myself useless and trapped and wait for summer only.
Hey, you, whatever is it out there! I need all of our plans to work and be sucsessful.
You hear?
Just do it.
We'll do what we can.

@темы: my thoughts, my life

02:42 

Eighteen

- Are you single? - No, I'm plural!
So good to be true.
I said I go to the shop and instead I met with one of my lovers.
Yay! Still got the fire in me.
Maybe it was some kind of depression when I decided to stop it all.
Too soon.
Maybe some morals and whatever, but who cares?
My life is the only one I have and it's my business to live it like I want.

And since then I had (for the first time in a while) an erotic dream. Wow-wow, I wonder why? :gigi:
It was a combination, compilation of the two lovers again.
They are too different, how to pick one?
Men are so sensitive about ending relationships if they think it's ok to continue.
To hell with it.

Bought myself a cool birthday present.

@темы: my thoughts, my life

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